The best animal jokes

Customer: "Waiter, there’s a fly swimming in my soup." Waiter: "So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?"
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Although cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why did the tadpole feel lonely? Because he was newt to the area.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do headmasters and bullfrogs have in common? Both have big heads that consist mostly of mouth.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
How would you get four reindeer in a car? Two in the front and two in the back. And how do you get four polar bears in a car? Take the reindeer out first.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
As horses say to one another. Any friend of yours is a palomino!
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
A mean horseman went into a saddler's shop and asked for one spur. "One spur?" asked the saddler. "Surely you mean a pair of spurs, sir?" "No, just one," replied the horseman. "If I can get one side of the horse to go, the other side is bound to come with it!"
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
Two shepherds lean on their crooks at the end of a long day and the first asks the second, "So, how's it going?" The second one sighed and shook his head, "Not good, I can't pay my bills, my health isn't good, my kids don't respect me, and my wife is leaving me." The first replied, "Well, don't lose any sheep over it."
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has 61.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, health, money, wife
A guy rings his boss and says "I can't come to work today" The boss asks why and the guy says "it's my eyes." "What's wrong with your eyes?" asks the boss. "I just can't see myself coming to work, so I'm going fishing instead..."
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has 61.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal
Knock, knock. Who's there? Kanga. Kanga who? Actually, it's kangaroo!
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has 61.05 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: animal, knock-knock
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