An ant and an elephant share a night of romance.
The next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead.
"Shit!" says the ant.
"One night of passion and I will spend the rest of my life digging a grave!"
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
Two goldfish are in a tank.
One said to the other: "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Yo' Mama is so ugly, when I walked past your fence, she came out barking.
When is a farmer like a magician?
When he turns his cow into pasture.
Where do steers go to dance?
To the Meat Ball.
Why couldn't the cow leave the farm?
She was pasteurized.
What are the spots on black-and-white cows?
Holstaines.
What did the bunny want to do when he grew up?
Join the Hare Force.
What do you call a gigantic polar bear?
Nothing, you just run away.