The best animal jokes

What's at the end of Moby Dick? A whale of a time.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, time
A beautiful princess comes upon a frog in a meadow near her castle. The frog hops into the princess' lap and says, "My lady, one kiss from you, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I once was, and then, my sweet, we can marry and set-up housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever be happy doing so." That night, as the princess dines on lightly sauteed frog legs, she chuckles to herself, "I don't f**kin' think so."
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has 54.20 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: animal, beauty, marriage
How did the blonde try to kill the bird?? She threw it off a cliff.
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has 54.16 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What would you get if you cross a trumpet and a serpent? A: A snake in the brass.
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has 54.16 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Which American duo became famous for stealing horses? A: Bonnie and Clydesdale.
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has 54.16 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
I thought I was at a Nicki Minaj concert for 20 minutes before I realized I was just watching a homeless man yell at a pigeon.
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, celebrity, life, music
Chuck Norris invented the Giraffe when he roundhouse kicked a spotted Horse in the chin.
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
First Kangaroo: If you were surrounded by 30 lions, 25 elephants and 10 hippos, how would you get away from them? Second Kangaroo: Step off the merry-go-round.
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: why did the cow cross the road? A: So he could pass the milkyway.
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, travel
Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk. As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says, "Vietnam, 1969." The other points his thumb behind him and says, "Dog crap, 20 feet back."
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has 54.13 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: animal
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