The best animal jokes

What happened to the cold jellyfish? It set.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
What's at the end of Moby Dick? A whale of a time.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, time
Gay translation I want a commitment. I'm sick of masturbation. Haven't I seen you before? Nice ass. I need you. My hand is tired. You're the only man I've ever cared about. You are the only man who hasn't rejected me. I'm a Romantic. I'm poor. I really want to get to know you better. So I can tell my friends about it. It's just orange juice, try it. 3 more shots, and he'll have his legs around my head. He's kinda cute. I want to have sex with him till my dick turns blue! He's not my type. He won't sleep with me. I miss you so much I am so horny that my dog is starting to look good. I had a wonderful time last night. Who the hell are you? Do you love me? I've done something stupid and you might find out. Do you 'really' love me? I've done something stupid and you're going to find out. I'll give you a call. I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again. I've been thinking a lot. You're not as attractive as when I was drunk. I think we should just be friends. You're ugly. I've learned a lot from you. Next!!!!
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has 54.22 % from 258 votes. More jokes about: animal, gay, love, masturbation, ugly
A beautiful princess comes upon a frog in a meadow near her castle. The frog hops into the princess' lap and says, "My lady, one kiss from you, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I once was, and then, my sweet, we can marry and set-up housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever be happy doing so." That night, as the princess dines on lightly sauteed frog legs, she chuckles to herself, "I don't f**kin' think so."
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has 54.20 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: animal, beauty, marriage
How did the blonde try to kill the bird?? She threw it off a cliff.
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has 54.16 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What would you get if you cross a trumpet and a serpent? A: A snake in the brass.
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has 54.16 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Which American duo became famous for stealing horses? A: Bonnie and Clydesdale.
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has 54.16 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe, and the giraffe gets waay too drunk. The bartender says, "Hey! you can't leave that lyin' there!" The guy goes, "that's not a lion its a giraffe!"
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, drunk
I thought I was at a Nicki Minaj concert for 20 minutes before I realized I was just watching a homeless man yell at a pigeon.
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, celebrity, life, music
Is Snoop serious? Or is Snoop Lion?
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, celebrity, life, music
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