Q: What is a black cat's favorite color? A: Purrrrrr-ple!
What is the most important use for cowhide? To hold the cow together.
What happens when the cows refuse to be milked? Udder chaos.
Where do rabbits settle their legal disputes? In a pellet court!
If they made a movie starring the Loch Ness monster and the great white shark from Jaws, what would the movie be called? Loch Jaws.
A lion was getting rather old and slow and having difficulty catching its prey. It decided it needed a disguise so that other animals did not know it was a lion and would not run away. So it goes into a fancy dress shop and buys a gorilla suit. It then heads for a watering hole to see if it can catch something with its new disguise. On the way it comes across two eagles sitting on a rock. One eagle says to it "Hi Mr. Lion!" The other said, "Where did you get the gorilla suit?" The lion, rather frustrated, asks, "How did you know I was a lion?" The eagles then started to sing, "You can't hide your lion eyes".
Why was the racehorse names Strawberry Ice? He was a sherbet!
Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
The friend of my mother has taken look at the photo on which I was and has said: "yeah, the stepfather of Johny is a real expert of breeding of meaty pig types."
Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.