Joke #13315

I have two accounts on Facebook it means I have two faces. It's really good because one is cuter to attract people.

Facebook had a dislike button, then Chuck Norris joined. Nobody dislikes Chuck Norris.

A client calls to hotline of internet service provider: "I have a problem, internet stopped working two days ago, neither I nor my son nor anyone else can access it now..." "I see, do you know what's the operating system on your PC?" "Of course, I do - it's Facebook..."

I am often asked, "Is google a man or a women?" My simple answer is: It's a woman because it won't let you finish your sentence without making a suggestion.

Yo mama's so fat, that her MySpace has no space.

I forgot to post on Facebook I was going to the gym. Now this whole workout was a waste of time.

If tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses

Q: What do lipstick and mascara do when they get in a fight? A: They make up.

There is legend that goes like this: In a bar in New York there is a magical mirror If you go up to it and tell it the truth it will grant you a wish If you lie – poof it swallows you up. A brunette, a blonde and a redhead walk into this bar. They head straight for the mirror. The redhead goes first and says “I think I’m the most beautiful woman on Earth” Poof- the mirror swallows her up. The brunette goes up to the mirror and says “I think I’m the sexiest woman on Earth” Poof – the mirror swallows her up. Last, the blonde goes up to the mirror says ” I think...” Poof!

Chuck Norris can check his facebook on a typewriter.

Your momma is so ugly when she gets her beauty sleep she falls into a coma!