The best black humor jokes

First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?" Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
Vote: has 73.89 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, doctor, food
"Daddy, there is a man at the door. He says he is collecting for the nursing home." "That's perfect. Tell him grandpa is coming in a moment."
Vote: has 73.89 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, dad, family
Patient: “Doctor, Doctor… I can’t stop stealing things”. Doctor: “Take these pills for a week. If that doesn’t work, I’ll have a color TV”.
Vote: has 73.56 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, doctor, work
Doctor to Patient: "Don’t worry about your heart. It will function as long as you live."
Vote: has 73.02 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, doctor, health
How can you tell if you have acne? If the blind can read your face.
Vote: has 73.02 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, health
Two guys are bungee-jumping one day. The first guy says to the second. "You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico." The second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool their money and buy everything they’ll need – a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc. They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work. The first guy jumps. He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the second guy notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Unfortunately, the second guy isn’t able catch him, he falls again, bounces and comes back up again. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. Again, the second guy misses him. The first guy falls again and bounces back up. This time, he comes back pretty messed up – he’s got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious. Luckily, the second guy finally catches him this time and says, "What happened? Was the cord too long?" The first guy says, "No, the cord was fine, but what the heck is a 'pinata'?"
Vote: has 73.01 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, mexican, money, work
A guy dies whilst making love to his wife. A few days later the undertaker calls her and says, "Your husband still has a hard-on, what shall I do with it?" The wife replies, "Cut it off and shove it up his arse!" The undertaker does as he is told. On the day of the funeral the wife visits her husband for the last time and sees a tear rolling down his face, so she whispers in his ear, "It fucking hurts doesn't it!"
Vote: has 72.77 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death, husband, love, wife
So it's the weekend, and I'm on my back patio when I get this idea to call up my coroner friend Bob. "Bob's not here," his wife says, "he's at work." "Sheesh!" I think. "Poor guy doing autopsies on a Sunday." So I call him on his cell. "What gives, bro,?" I ask. "Homicide," he says. "The higher-ups need a report ASAP. I'll be starting in just a few minutes." I Josh Bob a little. "I'll be thinking of you, buddy. Right now, I'm basting barbecue sauce on a rack of baby-backs and I'm getting ready to open a frosty beer." "Not much different here," he says. "I'm about ready to crack open a cold one myself."
Vote: has 72.71 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, food, friendship, time, work
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is white, plastic, and dangerous to children. You put groceries in the other.
Vote: has 72.62 % from 87 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, kids, music
Why is Hitler never invited to BBQ's? He always burns the franks.
Vote: has 72.55 % from 112 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, Hitler