The best black humor jokes

This old man and woman were on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard. They searched for days and couldn't find her so the captain sent the old man back to shore with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something. Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the boat it read: "Sir, sorry to inform you, we found your wife dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled her up to the deck and attached to her very most private part was an oyster and inside it was a pearl worth $50,000 ...please advise." So the old man faxed back: "Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap..."
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has 74.27 % from 190 votes. More jokes about: black humor, old people, wife
Join the Army, meet some fascinating people, then kill them.
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has 74.17 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, war
Q. What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common? A. They both live off dead Beatles.
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has 74.15 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, music
Who are the fastest readers in the world? 9/11 victims. They went through 87 stories in 10 seconds.
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has 74.03 % from 319 votes. More jokes about: black humor
While we were working at a men's clothing store, a customer asked my coworker to help her pick out a tie that would make her husband's blue eyes stand out. "Ma'am," he explained, "any tie will make blue eyes stand out if you tie it tight enough."
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has 73.93 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, customer service, death, work
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
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has 73.90 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: black humor, life, men, morbid, time
I bet Rosa Parks killed it in musical chairs.
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has 73.84 % from 191 votes. More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, music
My aunt died, God bless her, at a ripe old age of 104. We called her Aunt Tique.
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has 73.68 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: age, black humor, communication, death, family
Bill Gates goes to purgatory. St. Peter says, "Now Bill, you have done some good things, and you have done some bad things. Now I am going to let you decide where you want to go". First, St. Peter shows Bill an image of Hell with beautiful women running on beaches. Then, St Peter shows Bill an image of Heaven with robed angels playing harps on clouds. Bill chooses Hell. About a week later, St. Peter checks in on Bill in Hell and finds him being whipped by demons. Bill says to St. Peter, "What happened to all the beautiful women and the beaches?" St. Peter replies, "That was just the screen saver."
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has 73.46 % from 146 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, heaven, women
I called that Rape Advice Line earlier today. Unfortunately, it's only for victims.
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has 73.45 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: black humor
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