Good News: A busload of lawyers ran off a cliff. The bus was destroyed and there were no survivors. Bad News: There were three empty seats.
Do you remember how everyone was trying to kill Osama Bin Laden? Well, since all of our presidents seem to get shot, why we just didn't make Bin Laden president.
What do you call a black woman thats had 5 or more abortions? Crime fighter.
Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
So it's the weekend, and I'm on my back patio when I get this idea to call up my coroner friend Bob. "Bob's not here," his wife says, "he's at work." "Sheesh!" I think. "Poor guy doing autopsies on a Sunday." So I call him on his cell. "What gives, bro,?" I ask. "Homicide," he says. "The higher-ups need a report ASAP. I'll be starting in just a few minutes." I Josh Bob a little. "I'll be thinking of you, buddy. Right now, I'm basting barbecue sauce on a rack of baby-backs and I'm getting ready to open a frosty beer." "Not much different here," he says. "I'm about ready to crack open a cold one myself."
Q: How many Ethiopians can you fit into a telephone booth? A: All of them.
Q: What do pregnant teenagers and their unborn babies have in common? A: Both their moms are going to kill them!
Why did Beyonce sing 'to the left', 'to the left'? Because black people have no rights...
Did you hear about the cannibal family who were caught spying by the witch-doctor? They were given a right roasting.