Q: What do the Jews hate most about the Holocaust? A: The cost.
Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: I don't know, I just like to hear them scream. Q: How do you get them out? A: Chips.
My dad was a complicated man. He was a huge racist, my dad, but he still tried to be a good father, you know? Like, he would tell me that Santa Claus was black — that way, when I found out he didn't exist, it wouldn't be that big a let down.
Q: Why can't orphans play baseball? A: They don't know where home is.
Chuck Norris has travelled many places and seen many faces. So too has his boot.
What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive? Popeye almost killed him!
Knock, knock Who's there? I'm Mr, Farter. Mr, Farter who? I've brought some insecticides to give to your mother in law!
Two boiled eggs in a pan, one says "Hot in here in it", other says "You think it's hot in here, wait till you get outside they smash your head in."
What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup? A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.
What do you call a black woman thats had 5 or more abortions? Crime fighter.