When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
How did they know that the driver had dandruff? They found his head and shoulders in the glove box.
I'm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do... by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely, Michael Myers
Q: Who may open the door without using hands, nor legs? A: An invalid.
Q: How do you know if a girl is pregnant? A: Shove a tampon and see if all of the cotton is picked.
A Mexican, white guy, and a black guy all go to hell and the devil told them that if they can walk across his hand without burning in flames, then he will give them a second life on earth. The white guy was really confident...first step, he caught a fire a disappeared. The Mexican, nervously toke the first step and noticed that he wasn't dead, he took a couple more steps and disappeared. The black guy started walking and made it all the way across without burning to flames. Satan was shocked and asked him how he did it and the black guy replied "chocolate melts in your mouth not your hands"
The best thing about Alzheimer's Disease is that you get to meet so many new people.
How long does it take a black lady to shit? About 9 months.
What's the good part of there being no blacks on the Jetsons? It means the future will be great!
Q: Why did hitter kill himself? A: Because he could not pay the gas bill.