A man goes to the doctor and says "I need birth control for my 10 year old daughter" The doctor replies "She's 10 years old and sexually active?" The man says" Active? Hell no! Most of the time se just lies there and cries."
Doctor to patient: "Why are you nervous?" Patient: "Because this is the first item I am going to have An operation." Doctor: "But I am not nervous though this is going to be my first operation."
Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
Q: What did the deaf, blind, mute girl get for Christmas? A: Cancer.
Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn't have any arms.
Q: Where does a black jew go? A: The back of the oven.
A woman is speaking to her friend, ‘My husband has got one foot in the grate.’ ‘Don’t you mean one foot in the “grave”?’ says the friend. ‘No,’ replies the woman. ‘He wants to be cremated.’
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson? He thought he would give him a paunch!
What's got four wheels, smokes and squeals? A bus load of babies on fire.
Q: What is height of Suicide? A: A dwarf jumping from the footpath on the road.