The best black humor jokes

How did the dentist become a brain surgeon? His hand slipped.
Vote: has 81.48 % from 99 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
A nun and a priest decide to take a day off, so they go golfing. The nun gets a hole-in-one, but the priest hits it into a sand trap. He's so angry, he shouts "God dammit, I missed!". The nun reminds him not to take the Lord's name in vain, and the priest apologizes and tries again. He hits it into the rough, and in his anger, shouts "God dammit, I MISSED!". The nun once again tells him not to take the Lord's name in vain, and he apologizes again. On his third shot, he hits it into the water and yells "GOD DAMMIT I MISSED!" and before the nun can say anything, a bolt of lightning strikes the nun, killing her instantly. Out of nowhere, a loud voice booms "God dammit, I missed".
Vote: has 81.04 % from 183 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, god, golf, priest
What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hit was The Wall.
Vote: has 81.00 % from 90 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, music
A few days after her husband's death, a grieving widow accidentally receives an e-mail from a man waiting for his wife in Miami. The e-mail reads: Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P.S. Sure is hot down here.
Vote: has 80.96 % from 501 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death, husband, wife
How are a lawyer and a prostitute different? The prostitute stops fucking you after you’re dead.
Vote: has 80.94 % from 529 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death, lawyer
What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.
Vote: has 80.60 % from 125 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, music
So a guy is walking with a young boy into the woods. Boy "Hey mister its getting dark out and I'm scared." Man "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."
Vote: has 80.16 % from 86 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, travel
What does the cannibal do just after he dumped his girlfriend? Wiped his ass.
Vote: has 80.12 % from 110 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, food, relationship
Want to hear a clean joke? The boy took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a man.
Vote: has 80.08 % from 225 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
A pretty lady is standing on the side of a bridge, looking over it and thinking about jumping off. A homeless alcoholic man comes up to her as he was walking nearby. The lady notices the man coming and says: "Go away! There's nothing you can say to me to change my mind, you cannot help me." "Well, if you're going to kill yourself anyway, why don't we have sex? At least I'll enjoy it" replies the man. "No way, you're disgusting, go away." The homeless man turns and starts walking away. The lady thinks: "Is that all you were going to say to me? Nothing more? Won't you try to convince me that life is worth living that I should not jump off? Where are you going?" The homeless man thinks: "I have to make it down to the bottom. If I hurry, you'll still be warm."
Vote: has 79.80 % from 177 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, black humor, disgusting, life, sex