The best black humor jokes

W: Where did Lucy go during the bombing? A: Everywhere.
Vote: has 79.48 % from 65 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor
Today was a terrible day. My ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
Vote: has 79.48 % from 83 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, morbid, relationship, work
Why did Hitler commit suicide? He got the gas bill.
Vote: has 79.47 % from 406 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, money
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Vote: has 79.37 % from 488 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, Chuck Norris, health
Want to hear a clean joke? The boy took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a man.
Vote: has 79.27 % from 259 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor
A beautiful young girl is about to undergo a minor operation. She’s laid on a hospital trolley bed with nothing on, except a sheet over her. The nurse pushes the trolley down the corridor towards the operating theatre, where she leaves the girl on the trolley outside, while she goes in to check whether everything is ready. A young man wearing a white coat approaches, lifts the sheet up and starts examining her naked body. He puts the sheet back and then walks away and talks to another man in a white coat. The second man comes over, lifts the sheet and does the same examinations. When a third man does the same thing, but more closely, she grows impatient and says: “All these examinations are fine and appreciated, but when are you going to start the operation?” The man in the white coat shrugged his shoulders: “I have no idea. We’re just painting the corridor.”
Vote: has 79.18 % from 70 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beauty, black humor, hospital, women
Old man: "Can you give me an erection?" Faith Healer: "I can make the blind see, make the lame walk and I can even cure cancer. But, I'm sorry I cannot raise the 'dead'."
Vote: has 79.18 % from 64 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, black humor, death, old people
They say the surest way to a man's heart is through the stomach. But personally, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.
Vote: has 79.06 % from 39 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, food, love, men
Use to be we had Bob Hope, Johnny Cash, and Steven Jobs. Now we have no hope, no cash, and no jobs. Please do not die Kevin Bacon.
Vote: has 78.97 % from 148 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor
What did the Boston Marathon bombers do that Hitler couldn't? Ended a race.
Vote: has 78.80 % from 326 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, Hitler


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