Hey dad, how do you feel about abortion?
"Ask your sister"
"I don't have a..."
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If you want to feed an injured woodpecker, take it by the tail and hit it to the tree.
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W: Where did Lucy go during the bombing?
A: Everywhere.
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Mummy, mummy, why is daddy swaying in the backyard?
Shut up, and give me more bullets.
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Q: How many dead babies does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thin you slice them.
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What's red and dances all around?
A baby on a barbecue
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Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog.
When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"
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Q: What did Hitler get his granddaughter for her 5th birthday?
A: An easy bake oven.
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Awwww, kids. They blow up so fast...
Get it, kids grow up so fast.
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Q: What was Hitler's favorite drink?
A: Concentrated jews.
It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds.
An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.
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