The best blonde jokes

A blonde goes on a hot date and ends up making out with the guy in his car. The guy asks if she would like to go in the backseat. "No!" yells the blonde. Things get even hotter, and the guy asks again. "For the last time, no!" says the blonde. Frustrated, the guy asks, "Well, why the hell not?" The blonde says, "Because I wanna stay up here with you!"
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has 72.54 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Two blondes finds a mirror on the sidewalk. The first blonde picks it up, looks into it, and says, "Hey, I know this person! I've seen her somewhere before." The second blonde takes the mirror, looks into it, and says, "Duh! Of course you have that's me!"
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has 72.31 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: blonde
The following sign was posted at a fast food restaurant owned by two blondes: "Parking for drive-through customers only!"
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has 72.31 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde pick ups her dress from the dry cleaners, when she leaves the Cashier says, "Come again!" Bonde said, "Nah..It was ketchup this time."
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has 72.17 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, time
Q: Why do blondes have "TGIF" on their shoes? A: "Toes go in first."
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth. In the end, there were two little baby boys. The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who's the other father!?"
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has 71.97 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde is working as a lifeguard at a swimming pool when a girl begins to drown, screaming "lifesaver! lifesaver!" The blonde thinks for a moment, and then asks "cherry or grape?"
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has 71.88 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: blonde
NASA sends a space shuttle up with two pigs and a blonde on board. While the shuttle is taking off, the NASA command center calls the first pig and asks, "Pig #1, do you know your mission?" The pig replies, "Oink oink. Get the shuttle into orbit and launch the trillion dollar satellite. Oink oink." Then NASA Control asks the second pig, "Pig #2, do you know your mission?" The second pig replies, "Oink oink. Once Pig #1 has completed the trillion dollar satellite launch, close hatch, and go back to Earth. Land shuttle. Oink oink." Then NASA asks the blonde, "Blonde woman, do you know your mission?" The blonde woman replies, "Ummmmmmm...Oh yeah, I remember now.Feed the pigs and DON'T TOUCH A GODDAMNED THING!"
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has 71.88 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead team were sent out to install telephone poles for the Telephone Company. After the first day, the brunette team had installed 30 poles, the redhead team had installed 37 poles, and the blonde team had installed 7. The contractor was outraged with the blonde team and demanded to know why they had done so few. "Hey, we saw what the other teams were doing. Their's were still sticking out of the ground."
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde, ginger, phone
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all enter a swim meet. The gun goes off, and the brunette quickly captures first, with the redhead coming in second. An hour later, the blonde emerges from the pool and complains to the judges that while she was doing the breast stroke, the others were using their arms.
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde
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