What is the best blonde secretary in the world to have? One that never misses a period.
A blonde asks a bypasser: Excuse me, would you tell me where the other side of the road is? It's on the other side. Strange.. When I was on the other side, people told me it's here...
Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21.
Q. What do you do if a blond throws a pin at you? A. Run...she has a grenade in her mouth.
How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to count the stairs on a escalator.
What did the blonde’s right leg say to her left leg? Nothing, they’ve never met!
Q:Why don't blondes get coffee breaks? A:It takes too long to retrain them.
Blonde walks into a doctors office and says: "Doctor, what’s the problem with me? When I touch my arm, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my leg, ouch! it hurts... When I touch my head, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my chest, ouch! it really hurts!" The Doctor replies: "Your finger is broken."
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!" "NO!", the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
Q. Why did the dum blond keep failing her driver's test? A. Because every time the door opened, she jumped into the back seat.
At work, a blonde notices her that cubicle mate has a thermos. She asks him what it's for, and he responds, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her cube mate asks, "What do you have in it?" The blonde says, "Soup and ice cream."