The best blonde jokes

A blonde is watching a ventriloquist perform at a bar and the ventriloquist, with his dummy, is telling blonde joke after blonde joke, filling the bar with laughter. After several of these jokes, the blonde stands up, infuriated, and yells, "Listen here, jack*ss. Not all blondes are stupid and the jokes need to stop, it is a very cheap way to get laughs." Stunned, the ventriloquist timidly begins to apologize, "Ma'am, I am so sorry. I had no idea I was offending anyone." The blonde replies, "Stay out of this, sir. I'm talking to that little sh*t on your knee!"
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More jokes about: bar, blonde, stupid
Q: What is a blonde's definition of a naval destroyer? A: A hula hoop with a nail in it.
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More jokes about: blonde, stupid
A 92-year old woman had a full cardiac arrest at home and was rushed to the hospital. After about thirty minutes of unsuccessful resuscitation attempts the old lady was pronounced dead. The doctor went to tell the lady's 78-year old daughter (who wasn't blonde any longer, but just had to be at one time) that her mother didn't make it. "Didn't make it? Where could they be? She left in the ambulance forty-five minutes ago!" the former blonde asked.
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More jokes about: age, blonde, death, health, hospital
Why don't blondes like to breastfeed their babies? It hurts to boil their nipples!
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More jokes about: blonde
She is so blonde, she studied for a blood test.
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More jokes about: blonde, school
While shopping at the grocery store, I noticed that the tuna packed in spring water was labeled dolphin safe, but the tuna packed in oil was not. I mentioned this fact to the blonde cashier and mused out loud, "I wonder why?" The blonde replied, "Must be because the oil would suffocate them."
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More jokes about: blonde, stupid
Two blonde football fans are walking along the road when one of them picks up a mirror. He looks in it and says, 'Hey, I know that person!' The second one picks it up and says, 'Of course you do, you idiot, it's me'.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, football
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A friend says, "O.K., "What's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy, W."
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More jokes about: blonde
How do you get a blonde to drown? Put a scratch and sniff on the showerhead.
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Why did the blonde have empty beer cans in her fridge? For people who don't drink.
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More jokes about: blonde


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