How do you get a blonde to marry you?
Tell her she’s pregnant.
How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
She fell out of the tree.
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!", the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
A blonde goes into a kitchen store and says to an assistant "Can i buy that TV please?"
The assistant says "Sorry we don't serve blondes."
So the blonde goes out and gets her hair dyed and then comes back and says, "Excuse me can i buy that TV please?" and the assistant says "No, because we still know who you are."
So the blonde goes out and gets plastic surgery.
She then comes back and says
"Excuse me, can I buy that TV please?" and the assistant says, "No, because it's a microwave!"
Vote:
There's this blonde out for a walk.
She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
"Hey" she shouts, "how can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river then shouts back, "You are already on the other side."
Q. What do you call a swimming pool full of blondes?
A. Frosted Flakes.
Q: Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency?
A: She can't find the number 11 on the telephone buttons.
How do you drown a blonde?
Put a scratch ’n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
How does a blonde commit suicide?
She gathers her clothes into a pile and jumps off.
What did the blonde say when someone blew in her bra?
‘Thanks for the refill.’