The best christian jokes

My girlfriend admitted to me she was once a Christian, so I immediately broke up with her. It may come across as judgmental, but really, I've only ever known and loved her as Christine.
Vote: has 71.52 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: christian, relationship
Q: Did you know that they had automobiles in Jesus' time? A:Yes, the Bible says that the disciples were all of one Accord.
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bible, car, christian, time
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside. The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!" My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor." Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?" He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
Vote: has 70.92 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: christian, Christmas, church, easter, work
After the baby was baptized, her four-year-old brother was crying inconsolably in the back seat of the car. "What’s the matter Johnny?" asked his concerned mother. Johnny replied: "That man said that he hoped our baby would be raised in a good Christian home… I just want her to stay with you guys."
Vote: has 70.72 % from 124 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, car, christian, little Johnny
Santa writes to Chuck Norris about what he wants for Christmas.
Vote: has 69.93 % from 43 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: christian, Chuck Norris, Santa
Q: Who was the smartest man in the Bible? A: Abraham. He knew a Lot.
Vote: has 69.55 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bible, christian
A man was beaten up by robbers on the road. He lay on the side of the road, half dead. A humanist came along, saw him and passed by on the other side. A Samaritan came by and also crossed to the other side. Finally, a modern Christian came along, looked at the man and said: "Whoever did this to you needs help."
Vote: has 67.88 % from 20 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: christian, stupid
What happened when the cannibal bit off a missionary's ear? He had his first taste of Christianity!
Vote: has 67.68 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, christian, food
Q: Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? A: Samson. He brought the house down.
Vote: has 67.64 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bible, christian
Q: Why did the unemployed man get excited while looking through his Bible? A: He thought he saw a job.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bible, christian, work


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