The best Christmas jokes

One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner". And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, elf, family, food
If Santa comes down the chimney this year and tries to stuff you in his sack, don't worry, because I wished for you for Christmas.
Vote: has 66.60 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, flirt, romantic, Santa
Yo mama so stupid someone said Christmas was around the corner and she went looking for it.
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

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Yo momma is so poor for Christmas she got a box, put two sticks on it, spun it and said son here's your xbox 360.
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More jokes about: Christmas, game, money, Yo mama
Q: What is an atheist's favorite Christmas movie? A: "Coincidence on 34th Street"
Vote: has 65.16 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas? A: So they'll have something to unwrap.
Vote: has 64.93 % from 70 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, mexican, racist
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, Chuck Norris, life
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E? A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, elf, Santa
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men? A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, men, sex
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. "Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols." "Thats nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?" Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!"
Vote: has 63.07 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, music