Q: What did one vegan say to the other vegan?
A: We have to stop meating like this.
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When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens.
And dies.
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Peter approaches the gates of Heaven.
"Knock knock," says Peter.
Miraculously, someone answers him.
"Who's there," a voice in the distance asked.
"God," says Peter.
"God who," asked the voice?
"GOD DAMMIT open these gates!
I've been a good neighbor, loved my wife and lost my virginity, twice!"
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Q: How can you tell if a lesbian is butch?
A: She kick starts her vibrator and rolls her own tampons.
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Q: Why is the camel called the ship of the desert?
A: Because it's full of Arab semen.
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In an African city, there was a club that all its members had long dicks.
On the other day, an European guy went to register his name in that club.
When he knocked the doorkeeper asked the guy's penis length the guy said:
"Mine is 10 inches long"
The caretaker appeared at the door and begun laughing:
"Here isn't a suitable place for you."
The porter said, "Look at me I 've turned three time my dick around my waist so I'm only a caretaker and you by a baby dick."
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Mother: "Why was the phone busy all night?"
Babysitter: "The fire department put me on hold."
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A lady goes to the doctor, and says:
"Doc, I have this smell about me that I can't get rid of no matter what I do. Can you help me?"
The doctor says, "yeah I can help you but I'll have to examine you. You'll have to take all your clothes off first."
So the lady takes her clothes off.
Right away the doctor says, "hold on, I'll be right back."
A couple minutes later he comes back with an 8-foot stick that has a little hook on the end of it.
The lady says, "oh doctor, what str going to do with that?"
And the doctor says, as he's going through the movements of opening a high window, "well I'm going to open the window, it smells like shit in here."
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Joke has 56.98 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, doctor, insulting, women
A German woman is walking down the street.
Eleven blonde guys walk up and attack her.
She screams, "Nein!, Nein"
So two guys walk away.
What did the flower say to be the bee?
"Buzz off you stupid ugly horny cunt."
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