The best dirty jokes

Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to... unless your in prison.
Vote:
has 76.98 % from 309 votes. More jokes about: dirty, prison, sex
What is 6 inches long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth, and has white stuff at the end. A toothbrush with toothpaste
Vote:
has 76.96 % from 403 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A man named Jed went hunting near the border of Alabama and Georgia. When he was going back to his truck, a game warden came up to him and asked him what he had in the sack. "Three rabbits," Jed said. The warden said, "Let me see one of those rabbits." So Jed pulled out one of the rabbits. The warden stuck his finger in the rabbit's butthole, pulled it out, smelled it and said, "This is a Georgia rabbit." Then the warden said, "Let me see your Georgia huntin' license." So Jed showed him. Then the warden said, "Let me see another one of those rabbits." So Jed pulled out another rabbit. Then the warden stuck his finger in the rabbit's bunghole, tasted it and said, "This is a Alamba rabbit. Let me see your Alamba huntin' license." So Jed showed them to him. Then the Warden said, "Where you from boy?" So Jed pulled his pants down and said, "You figure it out!"
Vote:
has 76.89 % from 246 votes. More jokes about: dirty
When do boys ask for a girl’s hand? When they get bored by theirs!
Vote:
has 76.86 % from 279 votes. More jokes about: dirty
One night, a horny old geezer decides to get himself a hooker. Since the man doesn't have much money, he looks for the cheapest whore in the nearest Red Light District. A short while later, he finds what he's looking for and spends $10 for oral sex and intercourse. The next morning, the old geezer wakes up and discovers he has crabs. So, he gets dressed and heads down to where he had been the night before. He notices the same hooker on the street corner, so he marches over to her and says, "Hey, lady, you gave me crabs!" The hooker replies, "Hey, old man, what did you expect for $10? Lobster?"
Vote:
has 76.85 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Dont you hate it when you open a bag of chips and its half full?! Yeah, that's how us guys feel about push-up bras!
Vote:
has 76.80 % from 330 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: Why do rednecks like having sex doggie style? A: That way they can both watch wrestling.
Vote:
has 76.77 % from 483 votes. More jokes about: dirty, redneck, sex, sport
An apple, a banana and a penis got into an argument one day. The apple says sadly "I have the worst life ever. People take one bite of me and throw me on the ground." The banana says "You think thats bad? People take off my clothes, eat my insides and leave my clothes on the floor." The penis laughs. "You guys have it easy. You try having people sticking you in dark, wet caves, putting bags over your head, messaging you for hours and making you do push-ups until you throw up!"
Vote:
has 76.72 % from 482 votes. More jokes about: dirty, food, sex
Hey guys. Bet your female friend that she can't use both of her elbows to touch her belly button. Thank me later.
Vote:
has 76.68 % from 582 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A kid walks by his parents having sex asks what's going on and his mother tells him, "We are making fishsticks". The next day the kid says, "Mom were you making fishsticks again?" And she says "Why, yes, how did you know, honey?" And the kid replies, "Well, you have a little tarter sauce on your mouth."
Vote:
has 76.59 % from 238 votes. More jokes about: dirty
<<<26272829
More jokes →
Page 26 of 96.