If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
Q: Why did the man put condoms on his ears during sex?
A: He didn't want to get hearing aids.
What is something nine out of ten people enjoy?
Gang rape.
What do a rattlesnake and a soft penis have in common?
You can't f**k with either one.
Are you a candle?
Because I want to blow you.
A biker walks into a gay bar and sits down to have a drink when a guy walks up to him and asks "hey biker you ever played barroom football"?
"What are you talking about" the biker replies.
"You know you guzzle a beer down that's the touchdown then pull your pants down and bend over and if you can fart the kicks well."
The gay guy goes first to demonstrate.
The biker states "I can do that and even better."
He chugs the beer, slams the bottle, stands up pulls his pants down bends over to fart the gay guy jumps behind him and shouts "blocked that kick".
Q: What did the prick say to the balls?
A: You guys hang around here while I go inside!
Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across?
A: A double dirty crosser.
A guy picks up a pr*stitute and proceeds to spend a couple of hours with her at a seedy motel.
A few days later, he finds that he has caught crabs.
He chases down the prostitute and says, "hey bitch, you gave me crabs".
She replies, "what'd you expect for ten bucks? Lobster?"
A girl was pampering a horse with her hand while watching display of the horses, suddenly she touched the genital of the horse.
The excited horse screeched, jumped and ran away very fast.
The horse’s guard faced the girl and said, “Ma’am please do the same to me, so I can run, chase and retrieve my boss’s horse.”