I've accepted every email offer I've ever received.
My penis is now 235 feet long.
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A redneck family shares one vehicle, the daughter asks her dad for the truck.
The father says "okay, you know what to do."
Then continues to lower his pants, the daughter says "daddy why's there shit on your dick."
The father then replies "ohhhh, that's right honey, your brother has the truck."
Q: What's grosser than gross?
A: Two vampires fighting over a used tampon.
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Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge?
A: The fridge doesn't fart when you take out the meat.
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Mom! I'm a 3D printer!
Oh come on, Tommy, close the door when you poop.
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Q: Why is diarrhea hereditary?
A: It runs in your genes.
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Q: What's the difference between apple pie and pussy?
A: You can eat Granmas apple pie.
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Two skunks observed a deer hunter sneaking through the woods with a rifle.
"I hope he's not going to shoot at us," said one skunk.
The second skunk bowed his head and said, "Let us spray."
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Q: Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple?
A: Finding half a worm."
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Two sperms.
The first one asked the second "How much time we need to reach the womb?"
The second one answered "To much time left... We are in the stomach now."
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