The best disgusting jokes

What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
A man working with an electric saw accidentally saws off all 10 fingers. He rushes to the emergency room. The doctor says, "Give me the fingers and I'll see what I can do." "But I don't have the fingers!" "Why didn't you bring the fingers?!" asks the incredulous doctor. "Doc, I couldn't pick them up."
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, work
What's gross? Farting in the bathtub. What's grosser than that? Catching the bubbles with your teeth.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: Why is it a bad idea for two butt cheeks to get married? A: Because they part for every little shit.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, marriage
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends how hard you throw them.
Vote: has 59.11 % from 170 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dead baby, disgusting
A woman walks into a restaurant and sits down. As she bends down to reach into her purse for her wallet, she farts loudly with the waiter right behind her. She sits abruptly back up, glares at the waiter and shouts “Stop that!” To which the waiter replies, “Sure, which way did it go?”
Vote: has 58.77 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
Do you know what would be sick? If you sat in Santa's lap and you felt him get a boner. Do you know what would be even worse? If he stood up and you were still sitting in his lap.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
A man visits his aunt in the nursing home. It turns out that she is taking a nap, so he just sits down in a chair in her room, flips through a few magazines, and munches on some peanuts sitting in a bowl on the table. Eventually, the aunt wakes up, and her nephew realizes he’s absentmindedly finished the entire bowl of peanuts. "I’m so sorry, auntie, I’ve eaten all of your peanuts!" "That’s okay, dearie," the aunt replied. "After I’ve sucked the chocolate off, I don’t care for them anyway."
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: chocolate, disgusting, family, food
Q: How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? A: Pick it up and suck it's dick.
Vote: has 58.52 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
Q: Why do men snore when they lie on their backs? A: Because when their balls fall over their a**holes, they vapor-lock.
Vote: has 58.51 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting


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