The best disgusting jokes

What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
A man working with an electric saw accidentally saws off all 10 fingers. He rushes to the emergency room. The doctor says, "Give me the fingers and I'll see what I can do." "But I don't have the fingers!" "Why didn't you bring the fingers?!" asks the incredulous doctor. "Doc, I couldn't pick them up."
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, work
Him: "I'm going to come and see you, I don't care about the gas prices or anything I'm coming to no matter what." Her: "Aw okay, I'm going to get ready." Him: "I love you, I can't wait to see you, I'm getting ready to leave." Her: "Okay honey, I'm on my period, just letting you know." Him: "My car just blew up, I can't come see you." Her: "Get your friend to bring you, he always does." Him: "He got shot I can't come, sorry." Her: "Never mind I'm not on my period, my panties are just red." Him: "My boy said he is okay, he's going to take me, I'm going." Her: "I'm really on my period." Him: "Damn! He got shot again..."
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, friendship, love, relationship
A woman walks into a restaurant and sits down. As she bends down to reach into her purse for her wallet, she farts loudly with the waiter right behind her. She sits abruptly back up, glares at the waiter and shouts “Stop that!” To which the waiter replies, “Sure, which way did it go?”
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has 58.77 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
A guy is going down on a prostitute. During the process he pulls out a piece of corn. Mildly disgusted, he tries to forget about it and continues. Then he finds a chunk of carrot and a pea, and he says, "I think I am going to be sick." The whore looks up and says, "That's what the last guy said!"
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food, health
Do you know what would be sick? If you sat in Santa's lap and you felt him get a boner. Do you know what would be even worse? If he stood up and you were still sitting in his lap.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Friend 1: "I like my women how I like my milk." Friend 2: "What? White?" Friend 1: "No, expired."
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has 58.67 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, friendship, white people, wife
I've accepted every email offer I've ever received. My penis is now 235 feet long.
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has 58.60 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, sex
Q: Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets? A: He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
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