What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
An Aggie and a Longhorn had just bought a ranch together, so they were driving the fence line to check everything out when they came upon a goat with his head stuck in a fence. So the Longhorn gets out of the truck, looks around, and then starts screwing the goat. He gets finished, takes a step back, ands asks the Aggie, "Hey, you want a piece of this?" The Aggie says, ´"Yeah, but do I have to stick my head in the fence?"
How can you tell if a porno was made in the 70's? The guys' schlongs have sideburns!
Cannibal Son: Mom, I don't like my brother anymore. Cannibal Mother: You shut up and eat!
Q: What compliment do you NOT want from a midget? A: Wow! Your hair smells good!
What does a cannibal eat with cheese? Pickled organs.
What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? See ya next month.
There were two church-going women gossiping in front of the store when a dusty old cowboy rode up. He tied up in front of the saloon, walked around behind his horse, lifted its tail and kissed the horse full on its rectum. Repulsed, one of the women asked, "That's disgusting, why did you do THAT?" To which the cowboy replied, "I've got chapped lips." Confused, the women continued, "Does that make them feel better?" "No, but it stops me from licking them!"
Question: If you went to a party and woke up with a condom in your ass would you tell anyone? Answer: No! Response: Wanna go to a party?
What's green and yellow and eats nuts? Gonorrhea.