The best disgusting jokes

A young man and a young woman were soon to be married, but they both had a problem they had never told anyone else about. The man approached his father one day before the wedding and told him about his problem. His feet REALLY stunk, even if he washed them constantly, he was worried that this would scare off his new bride, so he needed a solution, fast. His father pondered the situation and finally told his son to wear socks constantly (even to bed) and always wash his feet whenever he got a chance. The son thought about this and went along happy. The same day the young lady approached her mother and told her about her problem. Her morning breath was horrid. Her mother reassured her and told her everyone had bad morning breath. The young woman told her mother that this was not normal morning breath but easily the worst in the world. The mother thinks about this and comes up with this bright idea. She tells her daughter to get up earlier than everyone else and don't say a thing, go make breakfast and then brush her teeth while the others are eating. The young woman thinks and then runs off to get ready for the wedding, happy. The couple is married and they are happy, him with his perpetual socks and her with her morning silences. One morning about 5:30 am the young man wakes up to find one sock missing. He starts rustling around in the bed looking for it, which of course wakes up his wife, who without thinking asks what's wrong. With a look of shock on his face the young man says, "OH MY GOD! You've swallowed my sock!"
Vote: has 60.69 % from 38 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, food, marriage, wedding, wife
An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman's head. "Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper." "What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now."
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, animal, couple, disgusting, old people
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.
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More jokes about: animal, chocolate, disgusting, easter, food
Yo mama so damn short, she uses salt shaker as a toilet.
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More jokes about: disgusting, stupid, Yo mama
How do you know you're at a bulimic bachelor party? When the cake jumps out of the girl!
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, food
There was a young man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He dreamt that Venus was strokin' his penis And woke with a handfull of goo
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
That moment when you notice that one fork isn't really very clean when you're laying the table and you have to decide which family member you like the least.
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, family, food
What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? See ya next month.
Vote: has 60.04 % from 185 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, lesbian, time
Q: How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? A: Pick it up and suck it's dick.
Vote: has 59.80 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting
Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge? A: The fridge doesn't fart when you take out the meat.
Vote: has 59.79 % from 40 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, fart, food, gay


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