Boy Monster: Did you get the big red heart I sent you for Valentine's?
Girl Monster: Yes, I did. Thank you.
Boy Monster: Is it still beating? 
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Q: What do women and cats have in common?
A: Pussy farts.
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A fellow always wanted to own a pet skunk, so in the dead of winter, he took his girlfriend with him to go hunting for one.
After a bit of waiting, they bagged a skunk and brought him back to the truck.
The skunk was very scared and very cold, so the guy asks his girlfriend if she can keep the skunk between her legs to keep him warm.
"But what about the smell?" asks his girlfriend.
"Oh, he'll get used to it, just like I did."
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Why do babies have a soft spot in their heads?
So you can pick them up five at a time
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What's grosser than gross?
A bloody mary with curly, brittle hairs in it!
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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming?
A: Gulp.
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Yo mamma’s so hairy, last night I confused here with a bush and pissed on her!
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What’s funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume!
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Q: What's the difference between an epyleptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diahrrea?
A: One shucks between fits.
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Q: How can you tell the difference between a straight rodeo and a gay rodeo?
A: At a straight rodeo they yell "Ride them suckers!"
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