The best fitness jokes

I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two.
Vote: has 74.43 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fitness, flirt, gym, sport
Q: Why was the farmer arrested at the gym? A: He was destroying his calves.
Vote: has 72.77 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

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The Total Gym uses Chuck Norris to stay in shape.
Vote: has 72.76 % from 96 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What do you say to a bodybuilding cow farmer? A: Show us your calves!
Vote: has 70.40 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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A colleague was planning a trip to my business office and asked if I could find him a hotel with exercise facilities. I called several hotels, with no luck. Finally, I thought I had found one. I asked the receptionist if the hotel had a weight room. "No," she replied, "but we have a lobby and you can wait there."
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A: Somebody told him he was ripped!
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

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My six pack is protected by a layer of fat.
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, fitness
One morning, while she was making breakfast, the local fitness freak walked up to his wife, pinched her on the bum and said, "You know dear if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle." This was a bit over the limit, but she controlled herself and replied with silence. Next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast. "You know love if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bras." That was too far over the limit. She rolled over and grabbed him by the penis. Maintaining a vice grip, she whispered in his ear, "You know dear if you firmed this up we could get rid of the postman, the pool man, the gardener and your brother."
Vote: has 68.01 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fitness, health, sex, sport, wife
Q: Why wasn't the bodybuilder evicted? A: Because he was squatting.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

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I heard that the missionary position helps men to work out the chest and triceps... do you wanna help me verify this?
Vote: has 66.60 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fitness, flirt, sex