The best fitness jokes

My six pack is protected by a layer of fat.
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: fat, fitness
Q: How do Columbians develop muscle? A: By pushing drugs.
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has 73.56 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: drug, ethnic, fitness
The Total Gym uses Chuck Norris to stay in shape.
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has 73.28 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fitness, health
Q: Why was the farmer arrested at the gym? A: He was destroying his calves.
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has 72.80 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: animal, fitness, gym
I do two hours of cardio every day. But I still need to find the closest parking spot to the gym.
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has 70.84 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: car, fitness, gym, time
Q: Why wasn't the bodybuilder evicted? A: Because he was squatting.
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has 70.01 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: fitness
One morning, while she was making breakfast, the local fitness freak walked up to his wife, pinched her on the bum and said, "You know dear if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle." This was a bit over the limit, but she controlled herself and replied with silence. Next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast. "You know love if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bras." That was too far over the limit. She rolled over and grabbed him by the penis. Maintaining a vice grip, she whispered in his ear, "You know dear if you firmed this up we could get rid of the postman, the pool man, the gardener and your brother."
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has 68.81 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: fitness, health, sex, sport, wife
Q: What do you say to a bodybuilding cow farmer? A: Show us your calves!
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, fitness
I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two.
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: fitness, flirt, gym, sport
Q: Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A: Somebody told him he was ripped!
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, fitness, IT