The earth doesn't revolve around the sun.
It's the sun that revolves around Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - three times.
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Once, Chuck Norris only filled his name in on the SAT.
He got a perfect score.
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Aliens do exist.
They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.
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Chuck Norris' feet are so fast, he can kick you in the past.
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If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
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Chuck Norris uses paper to cut scissors.
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When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
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The only mark ever made on Chuck Norris is his birth mark.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers the command line.
An ancient Chinese prophecy states that a man will be created to protect the lands from all evil.
Chuck Norris killed that man.
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