The earth doesn't revolve around the sun. It's the sun that revolves around Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris' shadow stays ten steps behind him in fear of a roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris never felt fear, and he never will.
Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
Chuck Norris once played himself in Russian Roulette, and he won. No Questions asked.
Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
Chuck Norris can make a snowman with sand.
Chuck did enter the Dragon.
Q: What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object? A: Chuck Norris is clapping.
Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.