Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure began when Chuck Norris arrived from the future and roundhouse kicked that phone booth into the past.
Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"
Revenge is a dish best served...by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once broke the law... with his fists.
Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
A horror movie is Chuck's comedy.
Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
"With great power comes a great beard!" - Chuck Norris.