Chuck Norris sees dead people...and they run.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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There was no world recession, just Chuck Norris desiring a discount.
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There was no volcanic eruption in Iceland - Chuck Norris opened the BBQ season.
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Chuck Norris didn't cross the road... he was already on the other side...
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Chuck Norris can sit at the corner of a round table
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E only equals MC² because Chuck Norris allows it too.
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A bulletproof jacket is an imitation of Chuck Norris' beard.
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Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.
Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
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Chuck Norris only needs one bullet, because it should know to get back in the chamber.
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Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
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