Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
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Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin under his beard just another fist!
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Most kids pee their name into snow...
Chuck Norris pisses his in concreate...
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Chuck Norris can braid a bald head.
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Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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Bruce Springsteen calls Chuck Norris 'The Boss'.
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Chuck Norris destroyed all life in a place called Happy Valley.
We know it today as Death Valley.
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Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard.
They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
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Chuck Norris can actually describe the taste of purified water.
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Chuck norris can fix a plumbers crack.
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