Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
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When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
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In the late 80's When Michael Jackson first met Chuck Norris he turned white.
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The names 'Adam and Eve' were simply coverups.
They were really Chuck and Norris.
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Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.
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Chuck Norris can flush a port-a-potty.
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The Beatles' song "HELP" was written after they met Chuck Norris.
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Chuck norris farted in a ditch and the grand canyon was created.
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After Chuck Norris sweats the sweat evaporates into the sky and forms what we call lightning.
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When God said "Let there be light!", Chuck Norris said "Only for half the day."
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The reason newborn babies cry is because they know they have just entered a world with Chuck Norris.
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