Chuck Norris jumped the grand canyon...longways
Arnold Schwarzenegger always says he'll be back. But Chuck Norris always handles things the first time
Chuck Norris can turn diamonds back into coal.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
Chuck Norris can win a football game by spiking a tennis ball over a volleyball net.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS: The World orients itself to where he wants to go.
Sliced bread is the best thing since Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once donated blood to a man, hes' known as Super Man.
Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."