Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books.
The words assemble themselves out of fear.
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Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.
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Chuck Norris can pour a pancake so thin that it only has one side.
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The sun is the burning remains of the last planet Chuck Norris pillaged.
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Once Chuck Norris rubbed a magical lamp, nothing came out.
The genie ain't stupid.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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Chuck Norris can run a full marathon in just 3 miles.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook...
No one's his friend.
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When Chuck Norris works out at the gym, he doesn't sweat.
The weights do.
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Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.
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Chuck Norris got a homerun in bowling.
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