Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books.
The words assemble themselves out of fear.
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Global warming is the result of Chuck Norris getting mad.
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Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
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Chuck Norris once created a flamethrower by urinating into a lighter.
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Chuck Norris once threw out the first pitch at a NASCAR race.
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God said let there be light.
Chuck Norris said say please.
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Chuck Norris once was pulled over by a policeman for speeding.
Chuck gave him a warning.
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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
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Chuck Norris once had a pet monkey...his name was KING KONG
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If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS.
Chuck Norris decides where he is.
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