Water can drown if Chuck Norris stays underwater for too long.
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Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
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Chuck Norris can turn a vegan into a cannibal.
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Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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Chuck Norris can breath out with his nose and breath in with his mouth at the same time.
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Chuck Norris can stare you to death while looking the other direction!
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people.
It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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Chuck Norris has won tennis match against a wall.
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Chuck Norris can make a Java Program in visual studio 2010.
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