Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can startle his own reflection.
When Chuck Norris first saw Dragon Ball Z he thought it was a series of easy workout videos.
Freddy Krueger has nightmares of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris believes in victim's rights. His victims have the right to dig their own graves before he kills them.
Chuck Norris once won the title of Iron Chef by cooking instant ramen noodles.
Physics is bound by the laws of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris' muscles are so developed that he's had intellectual conversations with them.
How far can you spit. Try to beat Chuck Norris if you ask how far can he spit, at night look at the moon and don't wonder from were the craters come.