Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
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Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
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Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
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Chuck Norris once shaved his beard.
People now call it Bigfoot.
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Three seconds after Chuck Norris was shot, the bullet came out screaming.
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Once Chuck Norris signed a cheque and the bank bounced.
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When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
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Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us.
The only difference is, then he kills people.
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Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
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Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse.
He uses a lion.
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