Joke #10102

When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive. The zombies do.
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If, by some incredible space-time parodox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
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Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife.
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Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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Chuck Norris, Mr T and Arnold Swieznigger died in a plane crash they got to heavens door way and god asked them what there business is. Arnold replied "I want to be your right hand man". Mr T said "I wanna be your left hand man". Chuck Norris said "get the fuck out of my chair".
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When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris eats granite and drinks lava for his lunch.
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Chuck Norris caught all the pokemon with a Nokia 3310.
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Chuck Norris can turn toast back into bread.
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The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway. But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
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Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same. Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
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