When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
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Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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The only difference between nunchucks and the legs of Chuck Norris is that wood eventually breaks.
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Chuck Norris can access the internet from a walkie talkie.
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The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
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Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
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There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
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When Chuck Norris burns calories, he uses a flamethrower.
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