Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
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Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
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If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
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Chuck Norris can run a nuclear power station using a rowing machine.
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When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
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Chuck Norris sank the Titanic on a late afternoon swim.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear a wristwatch.
He always knows when it's time to kick some ass.
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Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can text using a rotary phone.
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Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
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If Chuck Norris ever got caught for speeding, he'd let the cops off with a warning.
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