Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
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If you step on a crack, Chuck Norris will break your back.
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Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris.
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Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
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When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
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Chuck Norris inhales carbon monoxide and exhales oxygen.
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They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
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When the fire department catches fire, they call Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris roundhoused a guy so hard he starved to death before he stopped sliding.
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When Chuck Norris talks, E.F. Hutton listens.
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