Why did we have a global recession?
Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
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In France, Chuck Norris accidentally won Tour de France by exercise bike.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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Chuck Norris solved Unsolved Mysteries.
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When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
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Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.
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Chuck Norris doesnt' walk away from explosions, explosions walk away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can punch your thoughts and give you a headache.
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Q: Do you know why infinity goes on forever?
A: Because it knows Chuck Norris is waiting for it at the end.
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Chuck Norris can choke you to life.
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Cement took a teaspoon of Chuck Norris to harden up!
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