What do you call the everyday routines of rabbits? Rabbits habits.
A man is trapped on a desert island with a sheep and a dog. After a few months, the sheep starts looking really attractive to the man. However, whenever he approaches the sheep the dog begins to growl in a threatening manner. The man takes the dog to the opposite side of the island giving it some food as a distraction. He runs back to the sheep only to find the dog growling at him. The man ties the dog to a tree with a large leash. He goes back to the sheep only to find the dog growling with a gnawed off leash around its neck. By now, the man is getting depressed and frustrated. As he sits under a palm tree staring out to sea, a beautiful woman in a tight-fitting wet suit emerges from the surf. She asks him who he is and, taking pity upon his lonely state, asks if there's ANYTHING she could do for him. The man thinks for a moment and then responds: "Could you take the dog for a walk?"
Pavlov walks into a bar. The phone rings, and he says, "Damn, I forgot to feed the dog."
Chuck Norris once rode a bull threw a China shop, the only thing that broke was the bull.
Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner? He was already stuffed!
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her face looks like a horse's ass flapping in the breeze.
Your mamas feet are so scaly you can see crocodile dundy in her foot bath.
Why did the farmer fence in the bull? The farmer had too much of a steak in him to let him go!
Why don't whales eat sushi very often? Of course whales like sushi. It's just those itty-bitty chop sticks that keep getting stuck in their teeth.
I went to the movie theater the other day and in the front row was an old man and with him was his dachshund. It was a sad, funny kind of film. In the sad part, the dachshund cried his eyes out, and in the funny part, the dachshund laughed its head off. This happened all the way through the film. After the film had ended, I decided to go and speak to the man. "That's the most amazing thing I've seen," I said. "That dachshund really seemed to enjoy the film." The man turned to me and said, "Yeah, it is. He hated the book."