Joke #10213

What do you call the everyday routines of rabbits? Rabbits habits.
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat? A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
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What is the difference between an pilot and a pig? The pig doesn't turn into a pilot when it's drunk.
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In India, cows wait until Chuck Norris crosses the street.
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh? Ten-tickles.
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has 61.92 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: animal, nerd
Two neighbors had been fighting each other for nigh on four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog. So Bob then buys a cow and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. After about a year and a half of Bob's cow crapping in Bill's yard; being ignored all the while, a semi pulls up in front of Bill's house. Bob runs over and demands to know what's in the 18-wheeler. 'My new pet elephant,' Bill replies solemly.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
A hound dog lays in the yard and an old man in overalls sits on the porch. "Excuse me, sir, but does your dog bite?" a jogger asks. The old man looks over his newspaper and replies, "Nope." As soon as the jogger enters the yard, the dog begins snarling and growling, and then attacks the jogger's legs. As the jogger flails around in the yard, he yells, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite!" The old man mutters, "Ain't my dog."
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has 82.89 % from 335 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, life
Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
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has 37.60 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, duck
Q: Why didn't go Noah fishing? A: He only had two worms.
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has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, bible, fish
A child walks into a whore house with a dead frog on a string trailing behind him. He makes his way up to the counter and says to the person behind such named counter to give him the most diseased woman you have. She looks down at him for a few moments and replies “I’m sorry but I don’t think I can help you….If you would like, we have this young petite thing that could be just what your looking for.” The child puts a 50 dollar bill on the table and repeats “I want the most diseased woman you have.” She looks down at the bill and hesitates but she says to him “I can’t, but we have this nice grandmotherly type for you to cuddle and snuggle up to.” The child looking irritated slams down another 50 dollar bill insisting that she give him the most diseased woman they have. A few moments go by and finally the lady agrees and tells him to go to room 114 and wait a few moments. As he goes up the stairs the dead frog on a string follows right behind him, hitting every step on the way. Half an hour go by and the child comes down the stairs with the dead frog trailing behind. As he is just about to step out the door and back outside the woman behind the counter stops him. “Excuse me, but I have on question before you go…what is the dead frog for? Turning around the child has a look of pure sencerity as he begins to explain. “I wanted the disease so I could give it to my sister, who would give it to my dad, who would give it to my mom, who would give it to the mail man…And that’s the Son of a Bitch who ran over my pet frog.”
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, health, kids
What do you call a cow who argues with her husband? A bullfighter.
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has 37.27 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, husband