Chuck Norris can do the splits in mid air,rotate his hips 360" so fast it lifts him off the ground thus making the Chuck Copter!
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The First Law of Thermodynamics states:
Matter cannot be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.
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Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
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Only Chuck Norris can cross the "Beyond" section of Bed, Bath and Beyond store.
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Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
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Chuck Norris uses an air bag... in order to protect the inside of his car in case he stops too fast.
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There's a medical term for those who willingly defy Chuck Norris... organ donors.
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Think of the hottest woman.
Chuck Norris did her.
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The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun.
The Earth is stationary.
The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
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Chuck Norris one checked the Library of Congress for typos during his lunch hour.
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