Chuck Norris can see all 50 states from his house.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
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30 lumberjacks once tried to cut off Chuck Norris's beard...
They were never seen again.
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Chuck Norris won a soccer game. He was the referee.
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Chuck Norris traveled around the world in 60 milliseconds.
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Chuck Norris doesn't contribute to global warming, he exhales pure oxygen.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar.
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Chuck Norris hit you tomorrow, is going to hit you yesterday, and you're now dead.
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