When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
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Big Foot discovered Chuck Norris and hid in the forest.
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The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
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Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee.
This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
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Chuck Norris likes steel wool... it's his loofah.
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Arnold Schwarzenegger always says he'll be back.
But Chuck Norris always handles things the first time
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Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes.
He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
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In the late 80's When Michael Jackson first met Chuck Norris he turned white.
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Giraffes were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a horse.
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The Playstation Network is down because Chuck Norris unplugged his PS3.
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Chuck Norris made Stevie Wonder flinch.
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