Law of Gravity doesn't apply to Chuck Norris, he enforces it... with a round house kick.
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Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine.
We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
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Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
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When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari
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When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school.
When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.
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When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens.
And dies.
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If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
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If Chuck Norris misses a roundhouse-kick, you will still die.
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If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
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Aliens believe in Chuck Norris.
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