When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school. When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.
Chuck Norris doesnt walk, the earth moves under his feet.
Chuck Norris took a nap. The result was the Great Depression.
Chuck Norris can play PS3 games - on PS1
When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books. The words assemble themselves out of fear.
When you die on Earth you go to hell. When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
Chuck Norris was a comedian, but everyone started to die of laughter.
Chuck Norris can only text if the phone's touch screen is bullet proof.
Chuck Norris once taught a book to read.
Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.