Joke #10360

What's a rabbits favorite movie? Rabbits of the Lost Ark.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died. "You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God." Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"
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has 52.04 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, dad, death, dog
At the pet shop, a man spots a parrot without any feet. The man leans in, "Hey buddy, how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?" "I wrap my little parrot penis around this wooden bar, kind of like a hook." "Wow," says the guy. "I can't believe you're so smart! I'm taking you home." Weeks go by, and the parrot not only understands everything the man says, but he gives good advice. The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot says, "Hey, I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the mailman." "What happened?" asks the guy. "Well," the parrot says, "when the mailman came to the door today, your wife greeted him in a sheer nightgown and kissed him on the mouth." "What happened then?" asks the guy. "Then, the mailman came into the house and lifted up your wife's nightgown," reports the parrot. "Oh no!" the guy says. "Then what?" "I don't know," says the parrot. "I got a hard-on and fell off my perch."
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has 64.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot, wife
A farmer was in a bar drinking and looking all depressed. His friend asked him why he was looking depressed and he replied,  "Some things you just can't explain. This morning I was outside milking a cow. As soon as the bucket was full the cow kicked it down with his left foot so I tied up his left foot to a pole. I began to fill up the bucket again and he kicked it down with his right foot, so I tied his right foot to a pole too. As soon as I finished milking the cow again he knocked down the bucket with his tail and I took off my belt and tied up his tail with my belt. As I was tying up his tail, my pants dropped down, then my wife came out and well, trust me, some things you just can't explain."
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has 78.51 % from 134 votes. More jokes about: animal, sex, wife, work
Q. Why are fish so smart? Q. Why are fish so smart A. Because they swim in schools!
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man buys a pet parrot and brings him home. But the parrot starts insulting him and gets really nasty, so the man picks up the parrot and tosses him into the freezer to teach him a lesson. He hears the bird squawking for a few minutes, but all of a sudden the parrot is quiet. The man opens the freezer door, the parrot walks out, looks up at him and says, "I apologize for offending you, and I humbly ask your forgiveness." The man says, "Well, thank you. I forgive you." The parrot then says, "If you don't mind my asking, what did the chicken do?"
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has 67.10 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal, insulting, parrot
How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling? She’s got that down-in-the-mouth look.
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has 18.30 % from 4 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call someone who sticks his right hand in shark's mouths? Lefty.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man walks into his house with a duck under his arm. He walks up to his wife with it and says, "This is the pig I've been f*cking'." His wife says, "That's a duck." He quickly replies, "I wasn't talking to you."
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has 62.30 % from 165 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, wife
Q: Why don't black kids play in sand boxs? A: Because they are affraid the cats will try to cover them up.
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has 57.99 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: animal, racist
Where do steers go to dance? To the Meat Ball.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal