Joke #10364

Chuck Norris doesn't go to therapy, therapy goes to Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor exclaimed, "It's a man!"

Chuck Norris was born feet first. It was the only time a doctor died during childbirth.

When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord. He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.

When Chuck Norris was born, the only person crying was the doctor.

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb.

The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second. It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.

Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.

A famous boxer must be operated by appendicitis. From the operation room the doctor gets out holding himself to the walls with a bruised eye and says: A can’t do this anymore! I try to anesthetize him, I count until 9 and he gets up and starts punching me...

Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They put up a sign reading: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology." The town council was not too happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to: "Hysterias and Posteriors." This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." No go! Next they tried "Catatonics and Colonics" Thumbs down again. Then came, "Manic-Depressives and Anal-Retentives." But is was still not good! So they tried: "Minds and Behinds" "Analysis and Anal Cysts" "Nuts and Butts" "Freaks and Cheeks" "Loons and Moons" "Lost Souls and Ass Holes" None worked. Almost at their wits' end, the doctors finally came up with a title they thought might be accepted by the council: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Odds and Ends." APPROVED!

Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.