Chuck Norris is what you get when you open a can of whoop-butt.
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
Chuck Norris wins every political campaign, but politely declines the jobs.
Chuck Norris impregnates women without having sex with them.
Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
Chuck Norris's sign language is heard around the world.
Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
Chuck Norris can eat peanut butter with a straw.
Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
When Chuck crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.