Chuck Norris can cash two party, out of state checks with no ID, or else!
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A man once insulted Chuck Norris by saying he was smarter than him.
That man was Stephen Hawking.
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We'll want to preserve Chuck Norris for future generations, when he dies.
We won't be needing cryogenics cos Chuck's already frozen.
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Why did we have a global recession?
Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
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Chuck Norris can pop scissors with a balloon.
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Chuck Norris once was pulled over by a policeman for speeding.
Chuck gave him a warning.
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Chuck Norris knows what the secret crabby patty recipe is.
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Chuck Norris can skydive indoors.
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Chuck Norris can finish a Super Mario game with just one arrow key.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer.
Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
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