Chuck Norris can drink from an empty cup.
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Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb.
On his penis.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do steroids, steroids do Chuck Norris.
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Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
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Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
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April doesn't fool Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris fools April.
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Chuck Norris never felt fear, and he never will.
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Chuck Norris actually died a while back.
Death just can't get the nerve to tell him.
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In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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