Chuck Norris knows what color a smurf turns when you choke it.
God wanted 10 days to build the world, Chuck Norris gave him 6.
Chuck Norris once broke the law... with his fists.
He, who laughs last, laughs best. He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.
Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
Chuck Norris doesn't play dead for bears, bears play dead for Chuck Norris.
Ghost Busters call Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can run a full marathon in just 3 miles.
Chuck Norris can buy priceless moments. At a discount price.
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.